Need
by Vicarious Vanity
Summary: "She knew why she was so upset, and why she had been so attracted to Samara in the first place. She knew why, and it made her eyes prickle and her heart squeeze in the most uncomfortable way imaginable." Rated for instances of harsh language, violence and suggested sexual content. Credit for the cover image goes to Mallyxable.
1. Old Wounds

**Disclaimer: All Characters, locations, technologies, concepts, etc belong to Bioware/EA. **

**Credit for the cover image goes to Mallyxable on Deviant Art.**

* * *

**Need**

A crippling, gnawing realization washed over Commander Jane Anastasia Shepard, standing there in the starboard observation lounge on the crew deck of the Normandy SR2. Alone. She had just tried to kiss Samara. She tried to _kiss_ one of the most powerful, intelligent and downright gorgeous beings she had had the pleasure of knowing and was turned down.

Jane didn't consider herself a vain woman. She was not upset over being rejected. She wouldn't dare think herself so narcissistic that she would become distraught over having her affections denied in this kind of situation. In a way, Jane was blaming herself. She shouldn't have put the Justicar in such a predicament, shouldn't have pushed for something that wouldn't be. Samara was one of the most willful people she had ever encountered, so tied to her beliefs, her morals and her _code_. To see the look of longing and subdued pain in those hauntingly expressive silver eyes made Jane's stomach drop. Samara was hurting because of her, but that was not the main reason the Commander was upset.

She knew _why_ she was so upset, and _why_ she had been so attracted to Samara in the first place. She knew why, and it made her eyes prickle and her heart squeeze in the most uncomfortable way imaginable.

Walking quickly out of the lounge, Jane took long strides to the central elevator. She needed to be alone. She _needed_ to collect herself. She, the great Commander Shepard, couldn't allow herself to be seen by her crew, breaking down and sobbing herself into hysterics—

"Shepard! I'm glad I caught you, I'd like your opinion on something!"

_**Fuck**_.

Jane turned as she approached the elevator to see the familiar hooded, purple-masked helmet of her good friend Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Rayya. The Quarian engineer was exiting the port observation lounge and bouncing excitedly toward her Captain. Tali had always had an air about her that could brighten up anyone's day. The rest of the crew knew it and appreciated it. Even _Jack_ would be caught conversing with her with a large and terrifyingly genuine smile on her heavily made-up face. She knew she could speak to Tali about anything her heart desired.

But not now. Right now Shepard couldn't afford to waste time when she was so frighteningly close to losing _everything_.

"I just had a talk with Kasumi. I know she has information on everyone on board, probably so I thought she would know but I'd like to see if you knew anything as well, since you're probably what he considers his –how do you humans call it? 'Bestie?' Anyway, I know Garrus has been having a rough time since the whole Sidonis situation so I wanted to get him something—"

Tali looked up at Jane's face and immediately stopped her rambling. Her Captain's face was strewn with emotion, eyes glistening and lips slightly trembling. Tali was no Asari, she couldn't read minds but she had the advantage of learning how to read body language and facial expressions from behind her mask since her pilgrimage with the crew of the SSV Normandy. Tali had a bad habit of being loquacious when she got on a topic she enjoyed, but even going back to her days as an adolescent in the Migrant fleet, she knew when to speak up and when to shut up. It came with being her father's daughter.

The look her beloved Captain gave her in that moment was one of such _pain_ and grief that she instinctually knew. She _knew_ Shepard needed time to herself before the words had even tumbled out of her mouth in an jagged voice Tali had never heard her utter before.

"I'm sorry Tali. I just… need to be alone for a little while."

Without another word, Jane entered the elevator and quickly punched in the holographic buttons for the Captain's cabin. Tali stared after the Commander, worried, confused, and anxious as the metal of the elevator door slid closed. Should she tell someone that she had just saw her Captain on the verge of tears? Surely Shepard wouldn't appreciate it. She knew her Captain; she knew Jane would figure out some way to move past what she was going through, for the sake of the mission, her crew and her friends.

Tali lingered in the hallway for several seconds before turning and making her way to the mess hall, saying her hellos to Mess Sergeant Gardner and those crewmates currently off-duty populating the table and then continuing on to enter the forward batteries, greeting Garrus with a small tap on his armored shoulder. Hopefully she could pry some information from her Turian quarry himself about a gift while providing some comfort to him.

_Keelah, so many around here could use a small bit of comfort._

* * *

"Edi."

"Yes, Commander?"

Edi knew everything that happened on the Normandy. She _was_ the Normandy. She knew crewmate Eliza Burnham on deck three was pregnant. She knew Doctor Chakwas was currently listening to the popular Human classic 'Come as you are' by the Earth musical band Nirvana while nursing a glass of 32 Thessian red wine and waiting for blood sample data to compile. She knew Grunt was talking animatedly to Zaeed about assault rifle maintenance. She knew Thane was stepping out of his comfort zone to speak casually to Jacob about work out routines. She knew Jack and Miranda were arguing for the fourth time today over their respective preferred choice of clothing using rather 'colorful' word-play. She knew Kasumi was cloaked in Mordin's laboratory and was attempting to startle him by moving inanimate objects as would a ghost in popular Human folklore, to which he replied that if she continued, she would wake up with several new nodes in her body -that he would control remotely- that would stimulate her nerve endings to simulate being relentlessly tickled, where ever and whenever he wanted (whether he was joking or otherwise, she could not tell).

She knew Samara was currently alone in the crew quarters, hunched over and quietly sobbing. She knew the event that had happened in the starboard observation lounge.

She knew Commander Shepard had just walked into her personal cabin without checking into the CIC first, as she normally did. And she knew that based off of body temperature, posture, heart rate and breathing rhythm that it would not be long before Commander Shepard would also be sobbing.

"Edi… lock the door to my cabin. Turn off all surveillance Miranda has up here… Tell everyone to bring matters that aren't of immediate emergency to Yeoman Chambers."

The wavering in her voice was also a significant tell.

"Commander, The Illusive Man and Operative Lawson were clear that hourly reports were to be written on the current state of all crewmembers and officers aboard the Normandy-"

Jane cut off Edi with a tearful glare to her holographic appearance. Her voice became ice and her eyes became daggers. Even her biotics were flaring viciously.

"Do it or I will rip out your central blue box one motherboard at a time and toss them out of the damn air lock."

Edi knew that Shepard was an incredibly genuine, forgiving and even loving individual. She never lied to her friends and she never betrayed them or hurt them intentionally. She always gave her enemies a way out before they forced her hand. To have her make a threat this serious in such a manner meant that the Commander was enduring something that went beyond what had happened in the lounge.

"… As you wish, Shepard."

Edi had also been scanning the extranet and reading literature about organic relationships, a topic that would raise an eyebrow in question from anyone about why an AI would be interested in such things. Nevertheless, Edi knew enough about them that it would be unwise to circulate what had transpired between Shepard and Samara. She began work on deleting, forging and replacing specific video footage recorded in the starboard observation lounge and would omit the event from future reports.

Hearing the satisfying sound of the door closing and the finality of it locking itself behind her, Jane wiped furiously at her eyes and removed her black and white Cerberus Officer's uniform jacket, discarding it onto the floor and leaving her in a tight black tank top.

She had caused a crewmate and a friend discomfort, even after she had gone through the hideous ordeal of hunting down and _killing_ her daughter. Jane should be working to reconcile her actions but here she was, teetering on the edge of an abyss of her own making. Well, not entirely her own making.

She walked with purpose down the stairs to the small coffee table and sat on the couch. Jane reached under the table and fished out a small package that she had purchased during their last visit to Omega. She was sure she would never have use of them but thought that maybe simply having them would be a half-way decent idea, considering the circumstances. Thanks to current events, she was thankful she had made the purchase. Tearing the top strap and tapping the bottom of the pack on the palm of her hand several times out of habit, Jane took one of the small cylindrical objects from it and reached for the synthetic gas-powered lighter that sat next to the Prothean artifact sitting serenely on the table.

Jane had successfully kicked this habit to the curb years before; back when she had went on her second tour with the Alliance Military. Her Mother had been instrumental in her drive to quit, supporting her when she needed it and kicking her ass when it was necessary. But right now, Jane _needed_ this. She needed to get her head on straight. Mom would beat her ass up and down Arcturus Station and then put her on latrine duty indefinitely but she fucking _needed this._

Hiccupping with unshed tears in her eyes, she took the butt of the cigarette and placed the lit flame underneath it briefly, heating it slightly before placing it to her lips and lighting the end into a cherry. Shepard inhaled and then exhaled shakily; grey smoke puffing out of her mouth. The swirling mass floated before her, making hypnotic, swirling patterns in the air before she raised a hand and formed a field of dark energy around the smoke. Holding it there, Jane clenched her fist and closed her eyes, forcing her biotics to flare as the sphere of energy tightened further. The harder she squeezed, the smaller the sphere became. Her jaw clenched and she could feel her mind focus-

_Shepard…_

With a gasp, Jane's eyes flew open and she dropped the cigarette to the floor. The sphere dissipated and sent the smoke floating up into the ceiling to be caught in the air filters. She had read about this phenomenon: _Phantom cognizance_. If it was a deep enough connection, a Meld would leave residual effects, feeling your partner in your mind even though they weren't there. As if a piece of them were always with you. The very thought made Shepard double over with emotion, bawling to herself.

She had been willing to (and almost did) _cheat_ on Liara T'soni.

Liara, the very reason she was so upset, Liara, who had just… brushed her aside on Illium. Liara, who used her to do illegal data mining of private servers on Nos Astra to aid in a murder. Liara, who… saved her body from the Collectors… then, gave it over to Cerberus.

Jane had been furious with her former lover when she had revealed that information. Who was she to make that choice? To bring Shepard back from the dead in the hands of a known terrorist organization. She immediately regretted her choice in words after leaving her office. The look of indignity she had as Shepard stormed out would forever be burned into her mind. Just the thought of Liara feeling so miserable because of her made Jane weep harder, holding her head in her hands and pulling at her crimson mane. Even if she did feel justified in her anger, she _never_ wanted to be a source of sadness for the young Asari.

However, Liara's distance to her on Illium had spurred her on to –perhaps unconsciously- seek a source of comfort. That source came in the form of Justicar Samara. Shepard had instantly been attracted to Samara's strength of will, her confidence, her elegance. Their conversations were always interesting and her eyes were just so damn _pretty_. Helping the Justicar in her life-long quest to hunt and eliminate her murderous daughter had awarded her a new, wonderful side of Samara; a small vulnerability and a glimpse at the beautiful soul hidden away beneath centuries of discipline and training, both physical and emotional. It made Jane want to reach out and claim that soul, made her want to _be_ claimed by that soul. She was the bright, shining light in the darkness Jane found herself in, bereft of the love Liara had once shown her.

In a single moment, during Samara's rejection of Shepard's offer of happiness, Shepard had come to a realization.

She _needed_ Liara.

It wasn't a particularly happy revelation, initially. The Asari had caused her a great deal of heartache with her behavior. The fact that Liara was willing kill in cold blood in order to be one step closer to avenging an "associate" suggested something that made her very heart wrench itself deeper into her gut.

Liara had moved on. After two years, it shouldn't be a surprise. But if she had moved on, why had she kissed Jane during their reunion? The looks of longing they shared, the small touches to her hands, the way Liara had inclined her head forward when Jane spoke during the few short conversations they'd had about Shepard's acquisition of the rest of her team and participation in hacking into private information servers. All of that couldn't have just been on the surface, to keep up appearances and manipulate her, could it? Would Liara even do that? Could she? Shepard didn't even know anymore. She didn't know her former lover anymore.

Jane picked up her cigarette and stood from the couch. With an aggravated sigh, she stepped back up the stairs and plopped herself down onto her desk chair. She took another drag and wiped her eyes once again. Her cheeks were sore from so much crying and she was sure her face was as red as the hair that fell into her eyes. Jane looked up at the display case containing her model ship collection. Each one meticulously hand assembled by her, piece by irritatingly small piece. She was still missing a Quarian live ship model, the empty space staring at her as if angry it still existed. She deposited her cigarette into the empty cup next to her personal computer and turned her chair to stand.

Shepard tapped the glass casing that served as the lodging of the resident space hamster, Boo. With a quiet squeak, Boo emerged from his adorably small house inside the case, looking up at Jane as she reached in and gently picked him up. He didn't protest and instead nuzzled into the warmth of her hands. Jane smiled down at Boo and sat yet again.

"Boo… what should I do? I can't keep going like this. It's unhealthy and could endanger the mission."

The Commander sighed and looked over at her side, at the picture display that sat next to a data pad. Carefully cradling Boo in her hand, she reached over with her other and tapped the screen. A picture of her and Liara blinked to life on the screen. They were in Zakera Ward, leaning against the railing that looked out upon the vast expanse of the Citadel and the Serpent Nebula. It was the first place where she got a proper look at the Citadel more than two years ago, to realize just how enormous it was and just how small she felt in the galaxy.

Shepard had an arm slung over Liara's shoulders while the former-archeologist had her hand grasping her Commander by her hip. They were both smiling widely, Liara slightly resting her head onto Jane's shoulder. They looked so… _happy_. She smiled as more tears ran down her freckled cheeks. She wanted that again. She needed that feeling of being in Liara's arms, staring into her ocean-blue eyes that were just as deep as the Pacific on Earth. She wanted to fall asleep and wake up staring at that beautiful face and kiss those wonderfully soft, blue lips. Jane needed to feel Liara snake her way into her mind, touch the deepest depths of her consciousness and caress her in ways that were known only to them and them _alone_.

She _needed_ Liara.

Furious squeaking caught her attention as Boo writhed around in her palm. She stared down at the restless hamster and he stared right back up at her, as if he knew why she was so distressed. She smiled sadly down at him and stroked his small, furry head with the pad of her thin, pale finger.

"You'd like her… she loves animals with fur."

Boo took her finger in his tiny paws and began nibbling gently on her fingernail. Giggling lightly, Shepard looked back to the picture frame and sighed again.

"I know what I want. I just… How can I even begin to talk to her about it? She refuses to speak with me about anything meaningful! At least not while she's in that damned office…"

Getting up from her seat, she stalked over to Boo's case and moved to place him back inside. Jane needed a plan, she needed to get Liara alone with her –no cameras, no hidden microphones, no consoles, and no assistants- so she could discuss her feelings, get them out into the open and figure out how they can mend their fractured relationship. Jane knew she couldn't live without Liara and she resolved on doing whatever she could to fix it. If it had meant hacking more damn terminals, then so be it. Samara was also a concern. Jane couldn't just excuse her actions towards the Justicar; she would take responsibility after dealing with Liara.

She _needed_ Liara back in her life.

Just as Shepard was about to put Boo back into his case, her personal computer beeped to life with a newly received message. Cradling Boo once again and opening the message, Jane felt her mind working the cogs around and around as she processed the information on the screen. Finishing the message, she held up Boo to her face and smiled apprehensively.

"Looks like we just got the chance we need… I just hope it goes the way I want it to go."

Boo simply licked at the tip of the Commander's nose, making her genuinely smile as she placed the space hamster back into his case. She picked up her discarded officer's jacket and slipped into it.

"Edi."

"Yes, Commander?"

Edi's holographic image appeared yet again next to Shepard as she stared into the blue lighting of the fish tank in her cabin. She watched as the various fish she had collected swim contentedly to and fro.

"Resume operations as normal. Tell Yeoman Chambers I'll be down shortly… and tell Joker to set a course for Illium. There's some business I need to discuss with Doctor T'soni."

"At once, Commander."

Jane worked her fingers to input a command into the fish tank and watched as small bits of dried fish food came down. The tank's occupants happily swam up into the cluster of nourishment and ate away. Shepard smiled one more time before going into the private bathroom that was installed into the cabin and checking herself in the reflection provided by the mirror. Once she had her hair in an acceptable state and washed her face to make sure she didn't look as red and puffy as before, Jane exited and made her way to the elevator, cautiously optimistic about what was to come.

The still-lit cigarette was left abandoned in the empty cup, smoke gently wafting up to the ceiling before being sucked into the air filters.


	2. Shining Light into the Shadows

**Disclaimer: All Characters, locations, technologies, concepts, etc belong to Bioware/EA.**

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**Need**

"… **Here for the Drell? Reckless, even for you, Commander**."

Jane stared at the alien behind the desk. What was this… thing? It was a species she had never seen or heard about before. She couldn't even get a good look at whatever he was; as his figure was shrouded in the dark of the "office" they were currently in. After a brutal assault and infiltration into the ancient ship orbiting Hagalaz, Shepard, Liara and Garrus had finally made it to the central hub of this entire operation. The infamous Shadow Broker was before them and there was nowhere for him to run and hide. He would either submit himself or he would die.

"Reckless? That bombing on Illium wasn't exactly subtle."

The Broker's calm demeanor was unsettling. It made Liara nervous, a feeling that transmitted itself to Shepard in an instant, without even looking in her direction. Since their reunion and argument on Azure, Jane could feel Liara's consciousness scratching at the edge of her mind. Like a puppy scratching at a door, desperate to gain entry to see its owner. Liara had put their talk off until after the mission was complete. She had said she couldn't think about them right now, not when they were this close to the Shadow Broker. Still, Liara unconsciously wanted to be reunited with her once lover.

She had felt absolutely _dreadful_ for treating Jane the way she did. Pushing her feelings aside, using her, distancing herself from her when the only thing the Commander wanted to do was just sit down and _talk_. Half the time they spent in her Nos Astra office Liara had to mentally restrain herself from climbing over her desk and kissing her former Commander senseless. But right now they had a job to do. They had to rescue Feron and deal with the Shadow Broker. Their reconciliation would come later.

"**Extreme, but necessary."**

Liara felt her biotics instinctually flare up in anger at the Broker's obvious detachment to the situation. He should be more worried! They're going either take him in or kill him, and he's just sitting there behind his desk with not a care in the world!

"No it wasn't! Do you know how many people lost their lives in that explosion!?"

"**Thirty-three dead, twelve injured, five crippled. A total of fifty casualties, seventy-two if we're including those killed who were considered potential direct witnesses to the operatives. You know the business I'm in, Doctor T'soni. Bloodshed is of negligible consequence**."

Anger rising, Liara screamed at the Shadow Broker. How could he be so heartless!? Even during her time as an information broker hunting him down, she _always _kept civilian casualties to an absolute minimum. Threats here and there were necessary, yes, but taking out 3 floors of a populated business center for one person and then gunning down civilians was unforgivable!

"It was monstrous! So was caging Feron for _two years_!"

"**Your interference is the cause of all this. Feron betrayed me the moment he handed you Shepard's body. The Drell is simply paying the price."**

Liara was ready to warp the Broker's body into a bloody, unrecognizable mass of bone and tissue, and was going to until she caught a look from Jane. 'Stay focused,' the look said. Even after two years, they could still communicate without the need of words or even a Joining link, a routine practiced and perfected over and over. They were a team, and after all this time, they still _are._ Liara felt her biotics recede back into herself at Shepard's silent request.

"You had to realize someone would come after you for working with the Collectors. Your friends aren't as neutral as you thought."

Liara could see the spikes on the Broker's head and back trembling minutely. Could he be…?

"**It was a mutually beneficial partnership.**"

"Heh, I'm sure they wouldn't be too impressed by their associate. His entire force decimated by a single team. It would be pretty hard to run a base this size with no crew."

Shepard was smirking, and Liara found herself staring more at her former Commander than their adversary. She missed Jane dearly, every second of every day for the past two years. She had missed Jane's smile, the way her face would light up when she was feeling witty or confident. She missed the way her face would crinkle up when she woke after Liara had, the adorable freckles on her skin lifting and shifting as she yawned. Liara missed the way Shepard's hair flowed in a river of bronze-red beauty. Had Jane cut her hair? It looked similar to the bobbed style Doctor Chakwas usually sported. Most of all, Liara missed Jane's _presence_.

Aboard the SSV Normandy, they had a near constant mental link to each other in the months after Saren and Sovereign's defeat. They could share anything with one another with a twitch of an eye, the smallest touch of a finger on the skin of an arm, the delicate breath of air along a collar bone. She felt safe with her beloved Commander, free to tell her anything she wished. The connection they had shared was _indescribable_. It served to add to her torment for these past two years, seeing Shepard –her dear Jane- in her mind so vividly every night but unable to reach out and grasp at her consciousness. Had she been a weaker person, Liara would have lost her mind.

Shadow Broker was unfazed by the jab.

"**They are expendable and replaceable. Your presence is barely an interruption.** **However, my current operations are of the utmost importance and require my attention. I cannot allow myself any further distraction because of a **_**traitor**_**.**"

Liara turned again to the Broker with a smirk of her own. He was cornered and bluffing. They had taken out his entire private army on this ship, he had nothing.

"You act quite confident for someone with nowhere to run."

The Broker finally turned his head toward Liara and she had to physically suppress the need to shudder under his unreadable gaze.

"**You travel with fascinating companions, Doctor. The Collectors' offer still stands for Shepard's body, as does the highest bounty for Archangel's head. Both would more than make up for your tampering in my activities and killing my employees on the way here.**"

Garrus growled in resentment as he lined up a shot on the Broker's head.

"I dealt with crooks like you every day on Omega. I'd like to see you try it, you son of a bitch."

"**It would've been as easy as writing a signature, had I the mind to do so before this event, Garrus Vakarian. Your friends and family aren't as protected as you think. Your father and sister on Palaven would've been excellent bait to force you back into your justice-seeker complex behavior and come after me blindly. As would your 'friend' Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Rayya.**"

Never in his life had Garrus worked so hard to _not_ squeeze the trigger on his rifle. Sparing Sidonis was easier than letting this madman live one more second without a bullet in his head.

"You're not putting a hand on anyone else."

The Broker regarded Garrus before returning his attention to Liara.

"**It's pointless to challenge me, Asari. I know your every secret, while you fumble in the dark.**"

Check. Liara knew who and what this creature was. She simply had to remember. Her smirk grew wider.

"Is that so? You're a Yahg: A pre-spaceflight species whose home world was quarantined more than sixty years ago for butchering the Council's first contact teams. This entire base is eons older than your planet's discovery, which means you probably killed the original Shadow Broker more than half a century ago and took over his work. That would suggest that you were somehow captured on your planet by the original Broker, himself or a trophy hunter and sold to the highest bidder before the quarantine. Intended to be nothing but a glorified slave…"

Liara could see the spines along the Broker's head and shoulders twitch and shake in muted anger. She had him, and there was nothing he could respond with. She went in for the Checkmate.

"…Or a _pet_. How am I doing so far?"

Shepard turned to look at Liara again and gave her the smallest, most genuine grin the former archeologist had been missing for _so _long. 'Damn, so cold!' Jane said with her eyes. Liara couldn't help but feel elation bubble up in her abdomen. To have Commander Shepard –her Jane- praise her. This was something else she had missed dearly.

The Shadow Broker rose from his seated position and all three of them had to incline their heads to keep eye contact with him. He was _massive_. Easily dwarfing even Wrex in height, his fearsome horns added to the menacing aura he was emanating.

With a sudden grunt, the Broker smashed his desk, breaking the polished metal in two with nothing but his _fist_ and threw one piece at the group. Shepard instinctively dove for Liara and sent the two of them to the ground. Garrus wasn't fast enough and was hit with the twisted metal, sending him flying to the corner of the dark room. He was pinned underneath the heavy metal of the broken desk and could only watch as his two friends and squad mates lifted themselves from the floor.

With a bestial roar, the Shadow Broker charged the duo. Liara looked briefly at Jane and Jane looked back, making eye contact. So began the dance they had memorized and finalized again and again. After two years apart, they were still a team. And a _damn good_ one.

Liara quickly ducked to the side of the Broker while Shepard took the brunt of the charge. Holding the Broker's large fists in her hands, she stopped his momentum fully and held him there for half a second before Liara began firing her submachine gun into his back, watching as his personal shield took the slugs.

The Shadow Broker growled into Jane's face, only to see her red head pull back and then feel her slam her forehead forward into his with inhuman force. He stumbled back, dazed briefly from the blow and saw Shepard advancing. The Commander began swinging at the Broker, landing punch after punch. These weren't normal blows, too powerful for a Human –even in enhanced body armor- to achieve. Liara was at the Shadow Broker's back, firing into him, but her real role was biotically strengthening Shepard's punches by increasing the force behind their weight, adjusting the angles of her arms and controlling the momentum of different parts of her body as counter-weights to maximize damage.

In essence: Shepard was the marionette and Liara was pulling the strings. It was a technique few biotics could achieve, even among Asari, and could only work with a compatible partner who was incredibly in-tune to their thought patterns, not to mention they had to be a potent biotic themselves. Manipulation of dark energy at that precise a level, and the mental compatibility to predict movements and muscle contractions to avoid serious injury required long years of tireless training from both parties.

Liara and Jane had perfected it in a matter of _months_.

The Shadow Broker, fed up with this game of fisticuffs, grabbed Shepard's hand mid-swing. He looked back at Liara, reloading her submachine gun and tossed Shepard by her arm at Liara like a rag doll. Both were sent tumbling to the floor as the Broker retrieved a modified, fully-automatic M-76 Revenant from the nearby storage pillar. Seeing the weapon, Jane scrambled to her feet, pulling Liara up with her and took cover behind another column as the Broker began firing. Liara could barely hear Jane's voice over the overwhelmingly loud rifle.

"Hah, one hell of a first date after a break, huh?"

Being this close to Shepard again –her Jane- was mind numbing. She could feel her Commander's breath against her cheek and her arms surrounding her. Liara practically _felt_ Jane's mind brushing against hers. Had it been any other circumstance, Liara would have been ecstatic and perhaps slightly aroused.

"Shepard, is this really the time!?"

"If not now, then when? Liara-"

"Shepard, enough!"

Hearing a break in the gunfire, Liara turned away and began firing back at the Shadow Broker. Taking the metal slugs, the Broker's shield wavered. Taking position and holding out his hand, a white barrier formed around him. Liara's shots were visibly bouncing off of it as the Broker allowed his shields to regenerate.

"Shepard, this barrier is kinetically sensitive. Projectiles have no effect!"

Jane unhooked the X-96e Mattock from her back.

"Then we do this the hard way."

Circling around the Shadow Broker while he was focused on Liara, Jane came up behind him. Just as his barrier fell and before he could fully move, Shepard smashed the butt of the rifle into the side of the Broker's face. She could almost hear bone crack and fragment underneath his rust-red skin even through his newly powered up personal shield. Raising her gun again while Liara weakened him further with a warp, Shepard fired off several rounds into his chest while moving in for another strike with her rifle.

With another gruff bellow, the Yahg held up his left arm and projected a large, holographic shield before Shepard could land the hit. Her blow bounced off of the shield, as did her rifle and her body as the Broker swung his arm in her direction, knocking her off balance and to the ground. Liara fired more rounds at him and he turned to advance on the former archeologist. Liara had fired several more slugs but none would get past the large shield. The Shadow Broker found his footing slipping as Shepard generated a powerful shockwave from her position on the floor and he reeled back enough for Liara to send a singularity at his left side. His shield dragged away into the singularity, Shepard let her biotics flare as she charged forward at incredible speeds, crashing into the Broker and putting him on his back.

Swiftly recovering, he raised his white barrier once more. Jane closed in again and slammed her fist square into his forehead, propelled by Liara's biotics. Dropping his barrier, the Shadow Broker raised his holo-shield once more and blocked Shepard's next strike. She struggled against the Broker's shield as she tried to keep her balance. Liara had tried to come to Jane's side to aid her, but was knocked away with her once lover as the Broker swatted them away.

Breathing heavily, Liara looked up at the Shadow Broker. They couldn't keep going on like this; expending biotics to such a degree was fatiguing, even for them. Not to mention they were running dangerously low on thermal clips from the punishing gauntlet they endured to arrive here. There had to be a way to bring that barrier down permanently. She brought her gaze to the ceiling and saw the answer: What looked to be a large circular tank swirling with white energy was held above them, the same shimmering color as the Broker's barrier. Shepard caught the thought and brought her gaze upwards as well, then back over to Liara.

"Get him to bring that barrier up again."

Jane grinned and got to her feet once more. She advanced on the Shadow Broker and drew her S-22b Eviscerator. Firing two of the three rounds into his shield, Shepard closed in and ducked as Liara focused her biotic energy into a single point and propelled it toward the Broker's shield, knocking it away and allowing Jane to put her last round into the Yahg's three-sectioned face.

Screeching in pain, the Shadow Broker stumbled backward and brought his holo-shield up again, only to have Shepard slam into it with another biotic charge… only this time she did not stop upon impact. Jane allowed her biotics to reach their limits and felt the L3 implant at the back of her neck begin burning as she focused her energy on the two points of impact her shotgun had made in the holo-shield. If she over-exerted herself, Doctor Chakwas would have a stern talk with her once she was aboard the Normandy, but right now she powered through the pain. She had to. She wasn't just fighting for Liara's friend, Feron. Jane was fighting for Liara. Fighting for the life they could have together. She was betting their entire future on the next few seconds.

A crack could be heard and less than a second later, the holo-shield shattered into pieces, each blinking away as Shepard barreled into the Broker, sending him to the ground again. He recovered again, more aggravated than ever and brought up his barrier.

That was it! Liara saw the glowing liquid-like material flowing down from the tank above. The Broker was siphoning energy from the ceiling tank to power his protective barrier. With another look to Shepard, Liara had instantly conveyed her intentions.

Jane approached with Liara staying behind her, closing her eyes and preparing for her plan of action. The Shadow Broker dropped his barrier as Shepard closed and began a run toward the broker. Using his Revenant, the Yahg swung at Shepard in vain as she ducked the hit.

"Liara! Now-"

Instead of stopping to follow Shepard as she expected, the Broker continued his path to Liara while she was still preparing. Eyes closed, the information broker didn't see the Yahg approach as her hands were outstretched to get a good grasp on the tank above. It wasn't until she felt a large hand wrap itself around her forearm and lift her up with ease that she realized things had gone horribly wrong.

"LIARA!"

Shepard roared as she tried approaching, but the Broker began firing upon her without even looking in her direction and forcing her to take cover behind the broken remains of his desk that he had not thrown. Liara kicked at the Broker and brought her pistol up to shoot him twice –each shot absorbed by the last bits of energy his personal shield had before it went down. Before she could get one more shot into him, the Broker squeezed and felt the bones in the former archeologist's arm snap.

An ear-splitting cry echoed throughout the chamber, a cry that would forever haunt Shepard's dreams and turn them into nightmares. Liara had dropped her pistol from the intensity of the pain as the Shadow Broker clenched her arm tighter, grinding the broken bones within it and forcing more screams to tear themselves from Liara's throat as she tried to struggle in his grasp.

"**As I said: pointless.**"

The Broker tossed Liara aside, her head and back hitting the bulkhead next to them and dazing her as she slid to the floor, her vision swimming. The Broker reloaded his rifle and aimed the barrel at Liara's head, ready to squeeze the trigger.

"I'm still here, you **fuck**!"

Shepard yelled over the chamber as she charged over the debris and toward the Broker. She would kill this bastard and live with Liara. She had gone through too much, experienced too much pain, had too much at stake, and worked too damn hard for all of it to end here! She _needed_ Liara with her.

The thoughts quickly flew from her mind as she felt thick fingers around her throat. The Shadow Broker had _caught_ her out of the air, bare-handed, mid-biotic charge.

"**The Collectors didn't say anything about bringing your body to them while it still drew breath. You're too much trouble to keep alive.**"

Shepard reached for the pistol at her side, and then the Broker activated his personal omni-tool and she soon felt the terrible sting of an electric charge course through her body. Unable to move because of her convulsing muscles, Jane felt the floor slam into her back and the Broker's large foot on her chest plate, keeping her in place. She saw the gray barrel of his assault rifle point directly to her eye.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl as she turned her head toward Liara, who had regained enough consciousness to lift her own head. Leaf-green met ocean-blue and for the briefest of moments Shepard was afraid. This was the third occasion in her life where she was truly, utterly and completely afraid. The first was during the first waves of the Skyllian Blitz where she had almost lost her life defending Elysium. The second was during the destruction of the original Normandy where she _had_ lost her life to the Collectors.

For the first time in a frighteningly long time, Shepard knew true sorrow. She would not be able to see that face anymore, that beautiful blue face. She wouldn't see those eyes again, wouldn't feel those lips against her own anymore. Jane wouldn't know the joy of sharing her mind with the wonderful individual that was _Liara T'soni_. She closed her eyes and felt tears escape again. Jane thought the one thing that would no doubt be the last thought she and Liara would share.

_I love you… I've always… loved you._

_**Bang**_

* * *

… It had felt like an eternity passed from the deafening sound of a gunshot. Was she dead? She still felt the cold metal flooring beneath her head which suggested she was still alive, unless the afterlife had cold metal flooring.

Shepard opened her eyes and saw Liara –her lovely Asari- sitting with her back against a bulk head, cradling her bloodied arm and staring in shock at something just above her head. Jane turned and saw the Shadow Broker staring curiously at his weapon. The Revenant's barrel was bent sideways in a way that made it entirely impossible for a rifle to properly fire.

The Yahg snapped his eyes to the side and growled in anger. Jane followed his gaze and met her savior. From the pile of metal rubble and debris where the Broker had thrown half of his desk, the smoke from the barrel of a heavily modified S-97b Viper sniper rifle wafted upwards to the ceiling to be captured by air filters.

"I'm not out of the game yet, asshole."

Garrus squeezed off another round and it lodged itself into the meat of the Shadow Broker's throat. Dropping the now useless weapon, the Broker gasped and wheezed in pain as he clutched his heavily bleeding neck. Finding new strength in her limbs, Jane projected her biotic barrier outwards and sent the Broker flying off of her and into the center of the chamber.

"Liara, do it now!"

Raising her uninjured hand, Liara grasped the tank with her biotics. She felt every structural weakness in the glass and with a mighty effort, cracked the casing and shattered it with a wave of her fist.

The Broker stood too late. The white glowing liquid poured from the ceiling and washed over him. He began screaming in pain as his skin burned horribly and his barrier generator quickly overloaded.

With one final roar, the Yahg was bathed in liquid light and exploded in a flash, bringing an end to his reign in the shadows with a bang as his remains disintegrated into the air.

After a few minutes of silence, it hit Jane like a sack of Krogan as she closed her eyes. They had done it. The Shadow Broker is gone and all three of them were alive. All three of them. Her teammates were injured. Liara was injured! Shepard's eyes flew open and she scrambled to her feet and knelt over Liara's sitting position.

"Are you O.K.? Fuck, I should have been quicker, ignored the bullets flying at me, gotten to you sooner! Dammit Liara, I'm so, so sorry-"

Shepard couldn't finish her almost hysterical apology. She felt a gloved hand cup her face and looked up into wonderfully deep blue eyes. They shone with warmth and care and for the first time in so long, Jane felt the purest form of simple, magnificent _relief_. The love of her life was alive and safe.

"I'm fine, Jane… Please, go see to Garrus. He may be in need of more attention than I."

Nodding with tears of joy in her eyes, Shepard pushed a vial of medi-gel into Liara's good hand –squeezing it briefly- and then stood, walking quickly to Garrus' prone form. Liara watched her go to him, tears prickling at the back of her eyes. It was over. After two long, horrible, _terrible_ years, she could rest easy. Taking the vial and stabbing it into her upper arm, she stood shakily on her legs and cradled her broken arm as the gel took effect and numbed the pain. The adrenaline drained from her body as she hobbled her way over to the central computer behind the broken remains of the Broker's desk.

With a start, she heard voices sound from the various interfaces before her.

"What's going on?" "Are we still online?" Shadow Broker, are you reading me?" "I need an update." "What's happening?" "Is it still connected?" "Shadow Broker, can you hear me?" "Shadow Broker, are you still there?" "What's our next move, Shadow Broker?" "Shadow Broker?" Shadow Broker?" "Shadow Broker?" "Shadow Broker?"

Liara had to close her eyes to think. All these voices, all these operatives, all these resources, all this information. All lost if something wasn't done. She knew she shouldn't. She should disassemble this entire console and remove all traces of this organization once and for all. That was what she intended. That was what she wanted for _two years_. To take everything the Broker had done, crush it into dust and burying him in it.

But she had to do _something,_ and that something hopefully wouldn't turn her into what Shepard had angrily accused her of turning into, days before. Liara opened her eyes, hardened and determined. She tapped a holographic keypad with her uninjured hand and opened a communication channel.

A message was sent out across the galaxy to countless unidentifiable men and women.

"**This is the Shadow Broker. The situation is under control.**"


	3. Apologies

**Disclaimer: All Characters, locations, technologies, concepts, etc belong to Bioware/EA.**

* * *

**Need**

"Goddess… You were dead."

In Shepard's cabin aboard the Normandy, Liara hunched over Jane's desk with tears in her eyes. The leftovers sat on the elevated coffee table along with their wine.

After the final confrontation with their enemy and Liara's sudden induction as the new Shadow Broker, Shepard had all but demanded they returned to the Normandy to have their wounds properly treated.

As she predicted, Doctor Chakwas had wrathfully chewed Jane out for pushing her biotics past the safety limits of her implant.

'Must you _always_ make a point to put yourself in the most immediate danger possible!? I've seen children a quarter your age with better self-preservation instincts than you!'

After sufficient scolding, the good doctor treated the team's wounds: Shepard had come out of the confrontation with a nearly burned out biotic-amp, several fractured ribs and damage to her central nervous system. Liara had a minor concussion, an injured scalp crest, a fractured radius and a shattered ulna in her right arm which had needed immediate emergency surgery. Feron had severe neural damage that had accumulated over two years of near constant torture. Garrus had sustained several painful fissures along his outer chest cartilage, two moderately sprained ankles and a fractured kneecap.

Tali had been obstinately determined to help Garrus with his temporary crutches despite his insistence that he was fine. She hid the new thermal scope she had discreetly purchased on Illium in one of her many suit pockets and waited for the right moment to present it.

After appropriate treatment, Liara and Feron had returned to her new ship to begin preparations for her unexpected career as the Shadow Broker. She had also not expected Jane to follow her aboard, and they began to chat. Liara had shown Shepard the various features of the ship, the many useful resources the previous Broker had acquired (including a rather humorous investment opportunity to disrupt the business proposal of a certain corrupt politician on the Citadel to the Council) and after much not-so-concealed flirting, Jane had convinced Liara to come back aboard the Normandy for dinner and a drink.

Edi took care of guiding Liara on a proper tour of the newly rebuilt Normandy and introducing her to many of the new faces aboard -except for Samara. Edi had also read about delicacy in organic relationships and was already aware of Shepard's intent to address Samara herself.

After a much needed shower, Jane had forgone her usual officer uniform in exchange for the sleek black dinner dress Kasumi had acquired for her during prep work for the heist on Bekenstein. Kasumi had insisted on Jane keeping it as thanks for helping her reclaim her late lover's graybox. She had also said it would be a shame to throw it away when it did such a good job at showing off Shepard's "assets", to which Jane replied by snorting as she waved the cackling thief away before she biotically threw her out.

Shepard had Mess Sergeant Gardner prepare a meal (after practically forcing him to wash his hands several times under her intense scrutiny) of shrimp linguini, one of Liara's favorite Human dishes she had discovered after the Battle of the Citadel.

Shepard set the plates down onto the table in her cabin along with a bottle of one of Karin's finer Sur'kesh brewed white wines. She had to negotiate with the still incensed Doctor over the bottle but managed to bribe her with the promise of purchasing a new medical interface VI. With one final once-over, Shepard activated her omni-tool to raise the coffee table to a suitable height to allow for comfortable eating while on the couch and set proper atmosphere music for her cabin.

Not a moment later, Liara –dressed in a lovely purple gown that gleamed with each step- came through the door with a smile on her face and a gift in her good hand. Her other hand was wrapped in bandages and a medical stasis field to help the broken bones settle and heal. The date was going well enough, the food was great, the wine was better and they had had a laugh once or twice.

And now, Liara was bent over Shepard's desk, tears escaping her eyes.

"I'm here now, Liara."

Jane came up behind her and rested a hand on her shoulder gently.

"Shepard… Jane… I… I've mourned you for two years. Every waking moment, every _second_ I've missed you…"

Liara suddenly turned and buried her face into Jane's shoulder, wrapping her hands around her waist. Shepard embraced Liara's back, holding her urgently. Shepard could smell the scent of lilacs and the wonderfully familiar aroma that was old data pads, paper, electronic equipment and simply _Liara_. She could feel Liara's consciousness tugging at her own, begging for entry but not pushing beyond the boundary that separated them.

"I'm so sorry! I'm sorry for the way I… I treated you with disrespect, shunned your feelings, and demanded your help when you had every reason to turn away! And then you, out of the kindness of your heart, came to me with information to help. I-I don't deserve you, I don-"

At this, Jane removed her hands and placed them on Liara's cheeks, forcing her out of her shoulder to look directly into shimmering green eyes. Without so much as a blink of an eyelash, Shepard opened herself to Liara completely and wholly, and Liara could feel it. She could _feel_ it and she dove in without hesitation. She swam in her Commander's consciousness, felt every emotion: every twinge of fear, every burn of anger, every stab of regret, and every pang of longing.

As she neared the origin, all of it was washed away in an overwhelming tidal wave of compassion and forgiveness and _love_.

Finally at the birthplace of all these swirling emotions, each one following her and gently caressing her mind, Liara could only gape internally as she found the source of every single one of these feelings.

She found herself staring into a mental image of _her own_ face.

Unable to contain herself, Liara lunged forward to fiercely capture Jane's pink lips with her dark blue ones in a bruising kiss. _Goddess_, how she missed those lips. She could feel Shepard's arms weave themselves around her neck and brought her own hands to the curves of Shepard's hips, careful of her injured arm, and brought their bodies closer together. Bursts of emotions exploded through their shared consciousness filled with affection and adoration.

Affection and adoration quickly transformed into thoughts of lust and passion. Their kiss turned sensual as Liara brushed her violet tongue over Jane's moist lips, gaining entrance to writhe and wrestle against its pink counterpart.

Two years. _Two years_ of pent-up frustration welled up in Liara's gut. She felt the pronounced heat settle inside herself –no doubt Shepard could feel it as well- as Liara pushed Jane all the way to the armor and clothing storage compartment on the opposite wall, never daring to separate their lips. Thoughts intensified as Shepard brought a hand up to the base of Liara's crests at the nape of her neck, massaging the deep blue folds there and forcing a gasp from the Asari's throat and a passionate moan into Jane's mouth.

Blue tendrils of biotic energy radiated from Liara's body, encircling them in a mist of biotics as they were lifted up off of the floor. Shepard chuckled into their kiss as she felt tingling sensations run up and down her arms and legs as they floated over to the bed, her heels fell off of her feet to clatter onto the floor. Biotics are an integral part of the lives of most Asari. Depending on how well developed they were, biotics were part of their daily routine and had a role to play in many activities, including (and sometimes especially) acts of intimacy.

Landing softly on the bed, Liara rose up from Shepard's lips to gaze down at her beloved Commander. Jane was breathing heavily, her hair disheveled and spread across the bed in a sea of crimson while her face was blushed and her lips swollen from the intense make-out. Liara didn't even have to look into Jane's mind to know what she was thinking, not with those half-lidded emerald eyes staring up at her, _smoldering_.

_I want you._

The thought drifted between them, and it was unclear from which one of them it originated but it didn't matter. Liara felt Shepard's own biotics grasp clumsily at the small zipper at the back of her dress.

Amp-enhanced species including Humans didn't have nearly as much precise control over biotics as the Asari. Even the great Commander Shepard –one of the most powerful biotic vanguards in the System's Alliance- could be considered second-rate to the top-of-the-top echelons of the Asari military. Of course it didn't help that Shepard would be needing repairs on her amp soon.

Smirking, Liara used her own biotics to grab hold of the zipper while unclipping Jane's collar with her uninjured left hand. With a swift movement, the zipper was brought down as she unhooked the clasp at the front of Shepard's dress, moving down to place hungry open mouthed kisses on each patch of skin revealed. Human skin was always incredibly fascinating to Liara. The texture, color, indentations and discolorations widely varied from Human to Human, more-so than any other species. But Liara didn't care about other members of the Human race's skin at this moment; she cared about _Jane's_ skin.

The former archeologist lapped at Shepard's throat, eliciting a soft murmur that vibrated along Liara's exploring lips. Jane's skin was –for lack of a better word- incredible. Small freckles dotted almost every inch of her body, so faint that they were almost invisible unless you had a good, close look (and Liara would be damned if she was going to let _anyone_ get as close a look as she did). Liara had often taken pleasure in tracing them across her face and down her wonderfully muscled body with a blue finger. The taste should be considered a drug, at least for her. Jane tasted faintly like sweat, salt, an interesting soapy flavor reminiscent of the curious Human fruit 'banana', and the earthy taste of what can only be described as _heat_.

Liara felt Jane's hands make contact with her exposed back, fingers gliding and pressing against her spine in a delicious massage down her back that made her groan and suckle into her lover's neck in earnest. Bringing her hands to the dress, the Commander pulled the unzipped portions to blue shoulders as Liara extricated herself from Jane's throat with some effort. Sitting up and straddling her Commander's hips –the shimmering purple dress bunching up along her thighs- Liara pulled her arms through the purple sleeves and brought the top half of the dress to her front and down to the top of her naval in a slow, teasing manner.

Shepard brought her gaze downward, dragging along Liara's long regal neck, protruding collar bones, and finally to full, well developed breasts exposed to the cold air of her cabin. Like Liara's fascination with Human skin, Jane had an infatuation with _Liara's_ skin. It wasn't quite scaly, like Drell or certain sections of Turian skin but not fleshy like Salarian or her own Human skin. It was as if her Asari's skin was lovingly crafted from the finest and most supple leather imaginable, near completely smooth, utterly hairless and delightfully warm –standard Asari body temperature was several degrees higher than the Human standard of 37 degrees in Celsius.

Jane's hand began its exploration with Liara's soft cheek. The new Shadow Broker sighed in joy and nuzzled into the calloused hand, pressing a soft kiss into her love's palm. Jane's fingers trickled downwards over a smooth blue throat, across her collar bones and to the warm center of the Asari's sternum. She felt the strong, quick heartbeat beneath smooth blue skin. Jane looked back up to the infinitely deep, ocean blue eyes with a question.

_May I?_

The delicacy of the look in her eyes, the soft pressure on her chest, the way the thought floated through their mind. Jane was being cautious, and then she _understood_. Jane _wanted_ to go slow. For _her_. She _knew_ Liara has been hurting for so long. She _saw_ the images in her beloved's head: Liara bawling into her pillow every night, Liara at the military funeral and memorial ceremony, Liara working well into the morning through hot tears that just wouldn't _stop_. Liara trying desperately to keep herself composed when faced with the burned and mangled remains of Jane's body.

Liara… blaming herself for…

Jane shot up from the bed, hands on Liara's cheeks as fresh tears poured from her eyes. Jane rested her forehead on Liara's.

_Don't you dare! It was no one's fault._

_You died! You almost died again, right before my eyes!_

_But I'm right here._

_You're going to leave again…_

Liara brought her hands up to wrap around Jane's shoulders.

_I am…_

_Promise me._

_Anything._

_Promise me you're going to come back. _

_I'm not planning to die again anytime soon._

Their bodies pressed together, heat and desire and _love_ in abundance.

_I've missed you so much_

_I can't live without you_

_If you'll have me again_

_I want you_

_I need you_

Lips seared against each other, hands wandered, clothing fell away. Neither could track what was happening anymore. Words and concepts melted into emotion and feeling. Identities blurred as two minds became one consciousness. Two bodies became one being. Two hearts began beating the same rhythm.

The only thought that manifested itself was the one thought that was needed. The only thought that would ever be needed.

_**I love you**_

* * *

_Two-thousand-three-hundred-seventy-one: A Justicar must always preserve the life of her charge. They are not to be harmed until the Justicar's oath is fulfilled._

_Two-thousand-three-hundred-seventy-two: A Justicar must eliminate any Ardat-Yakshi who refuses a life of peace and seclusion._

_Two-thousand-three-hundred-seventy-three: A Justicar must take her own life if she refuses to fulfill the requirements of the code._

Samara sat in her usual haunt in the starboard observation lounge, mentally reciting the Justicar Code during her normal regime of meditation.

_Two-thousand-three-hundre-_

The sound of the door at her back opening caught the Justicar's attention.

"…Shepard."

"Samara…"

Samara turned slightly to glimpse at Shepard in the reflection of the reinforced glass window they faced, dressed in her officer's uniform. The Commander looked slightly uncomfortable, and Samara knew exactly why.

"Look, Samara I-"

"Shepard, please sit."

Samara shuffled to the side to allow Shepard enough room sit herself down next to the Asari. Hesitating for a moment, Jane sat inches away from Samara; both looked out toward the endless abyss that was the galaxy.

Samara was quiet, no doubt waiting for some kind of explanation. Luckily Shepard wasn't one to dance around the thresher maw in the room.

"Samara, I'm sorry about my behavior. I shouldn't have put you in that kind of situation. I was at a… really low point, emotionally, and I ended up hurting you because of it. I know you're married to your principles and your Code."

Samara had to smirk to herself. One of the things she absolutely adored about Humans was their almost obsessive need for self-affirmation and self-betterment. They simply couldn't sit still and be content with themselves. It could have been for good or for ill, depending on the Human, but it was one of the things she admired about them, and how it would eventually lead their kind into being one of –if not, _the_ most powerful species in the galaxy.

"I was trying to reach out for comfort and your reaction made me realize just how wrong I was on a lot of levels… I just… I came here to apologize and I hope this won't adversely affect our performance."

At this, Samara couldn't hold back a chuckle, an action that had Shepard eye her curiously.

"Shepard, listen well. I do not blame you, and there is absolutely no need to apologize. It is no secret aboard this vessel that you and the young Miss T'soni are a pair, and I am genuinely happy for you."

Shepard blinked in confusion. Were they that obvious about it? Samara smiled and brought her gaze to Shepard's emerald eyes.

"Things happen in the galaxy for reasons neither you, nor I, nor can anyone else even begin to imagine. We must learn to live with this fact. If it was my role to aid in yours and Miss T'soni's resolution, I am content with that."

The Justicar brought her eyes down to look at her hands, open and outstretched.

"Just as you should be content with helping me realize… that perhaps there is still a small amount of happiness waiting for me, somewhere in the galaxy."

Samara brought her bright silver eyes back to the void of space outside. Her face was as unreadable as ever. Within the depths of her mind, the Justicar could see flashes of deep blue and orange-red.

"My previous bond-mate was just as kind and innocent as your Liara. I loved her, with all my heart and soul."

Shepard's eyes widened. She had expected Samara to have simply calmed down at this point, not to open herself up further. Samara turned again to Shepard, placing a hand on Jane's clothed knee. The Justicar looked deeper into Jane's eyes, shimmering with hushed emotion.

"I am glad I could assist you after you had assisted me. Cherish your time together, for it is rare that we get a warning for when that time will be taken from us."

Removing her hand, Samara returned to her observation of the uncountable stars before her. Jane was dumbfounded. She had just caught another small glimpse at the stunningly complex and eloquently beauteous persona beneath Samara's Justicar exterior.

Samara began inhaling and exhaling in an obviously practiced breathing exercise and a thought occurred to Jane.

"I… I'd like to participate in your meditation. If you'd teach me."

Another smile came to Samara's thin purple lips.

"You are a remarkable biotic, even by Asari standards. My exercises may be of great benefit to you."

Shepard returned her smile.

"I'd be honored."

"Very well. I do not know the extent of control you possess, so let us start slow. Close your eyes and focus on your center of gravity…"

Almost four and a half hours of basic meditation passed. Two of them were spent trying in vain to teach Jane how to create and maintain a solid ball of dark energy, not just a hollow sphere, for extended periods of time –Jane had attributed her failure to her biotic amp being damaged, to which Samara could only chuckle.

Shepard exited the starboard observation lounge with a contented smile adorning her face. Approaching the elevator, the door slid open to reveal the familiar ginger hair of Yeoman Kelly Chambers. Kelly jumped in surprise and saluted.

"Commander!"

Shepard smiled and saluted back.

"At ease. Kelly. Looking for some grub in your off-duty hours? Gardner's cooking's got a lot better since when we first shipped out."

Kelly glanced down at her feet and quickly brought her sea-foam eyes back up to Jane's and smiled nervously.

"I'm just… making rounds on my off-time. You can never be too careful, y'know? Especially considering what we're up against…"

Jane had to suppress a smirk at the concealed lie. Whatever her true intentions were, the psych major was obviously disinclined at discussing them with her Commanding Officer. The ironic thought brought a surge of amusement to her eyes, hidden by their normal sharpness.

"Well, don't work yourself to death. Everyone on this ship has a part to play, and I need all of them at their best."

Kelly had to look away from the Commander. The intensity of those eyes could still make her knees weak, but Kelly knew her place. Shepard was taken before they had even met, and besides, there was another set of eyes that she was intending to see right now.

Saluting once more and excusing the Yeoman, Shepard punched in her destination for the engineering deck. She assumed since Garrus wasn't at his usual post at the forward batteries, he would be down near the drive core room with Tali. As the only members of the original Normandy aboard aside from herself, Joker, and Karin, there was a matter to discuss with them.

Samara had returned to her meditations alone. She had long retired from teaching others of biotic meditation, but teaching the Human Commander was fulfilling and strangely soothing. She silently hoped there would be future sessions with Shepard.

The Commander's sincere apology was heart-warming, if relatively unnecessary. She understood the plight Shepard faced; she'd had over seven hundred years of experience in nearly all matters of love and war. To have the young Human look to her with eyes of such affection had sparked a change within her. A change she had thought impossible for so long, one she was quick to capitalize on with a connection that had already been gestating deep within her that she had tried to bury since coming aboard the Normandy, before Shepard's actions.

The door to the starboard observation lounge opened yet again to a red-haired Human.

"Miss Chambers, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

The Yeoman pouted and Samara couldn't suppress her delighted smile at the adorable Human's antics. Kelly walked beside Samara's sitting form in the center of the room, cocking her hip while resting her hand upon it.

"You know I told you to call me Kelly…"

The Justicar giggled lightly as the ginger haired Yeoman bent down to sit next to Samara. She yelped in surprise as the pull of biotics shifted her trajectory and forced her to land gently into Samara's lap. Wrapping her arms around the Human's waist, Samara cuddled herself into Kelly's shoulder and allowed Kelly's smaller frame to snuggle into the warm Asari body behind her. Yeoman Chambers felt her tension ease away as she sunk into Samara's powerful and protective arms.

Yes, Samara had been extremely grateful for Shepard's actions. She had walled off the majority of her emotions since that day so many centuries ago when she had first taken the Oath of solitude, her first step to becoming a Justicar. To have them flood her very being yet again was an experience she could no longer afford to live without.

Both sighed in absolute serenity as a Joining link was made.

_As you wish… dear Kelly._


	4. Farewell

**Disclaimer: All Characters, locations, technologies, concepts, etc belong to Bioware/EA.**

* * *

**Need**

"… She actually thanked me after I was done! I didn't exactly expect fire and brimstone but I didn't expect her to smile as much as she did, either, let alone thank me."

Shepard said to Liara while aboard the UT-38 Kodiak shuttle. The shuttle's other occupants consisted of Garrus and Tali, seated opposite of the couple.

"Samara is a strong woman. She knows the stress everyone is under and she knows unsavory thoughts of would-haves and could-haves can cost lives on a mission. I'm sure she was nothing but grateful for your help in finding a bit of herself."

Liara replied. After their date, Shepard had confessed of her encounter with Samara. She had _begged_ Liara to forgive her and the Asari could only laugh as she held her Commander in her arms. She could feel every emotion, experience every memory, and relive every moment in Jane's life as her own in an instant. She _understood_ Jane's motivations, understood the pain and loneliness she was struggling with –it gave her no small amount of shame that _she_ was the source of those feelings. She was already forgiven the second their minds rejoined to each other for the first time in two years.

"You know, Shepard, we should open up a galactic service: 'Vakarian and Shepard Inc. Making the galaxy a better place, one personal problem at a time!' I mean, we already get involved with everyone we run into, anyway. We may as well make it a legitimate business."

Garrus jokingly proposed. He and Tali were the only ones aboard the Normandy that Shepard had also disclosed her emotional struggles to, and was comfortable enough with to speak of her interaction with Samara. They were both understanding and kind to her in her moments of weakness. Aside from her Mother, they, Joker, Karin, Wrex, Ashley and Liara were the only ones she truly considered her family.

Tali pushed a finger into Garrus' side.

"And why are 'Zorah' and 'T'soni' excluded from the name? I thought we were a team!"

"The billboard space would cost extra, obviously. Need to keep costs low and productivity high, right?"

Shepard grinned even as Liara pushed her own knuckle into her side, between the grey plates of armor she wore. The jovial nature of their conversation was only masking the apprehension each of them felt.

The destination of the shuttle was Alchera. The final resting place of the SSV Normandy.

After another two minutes of travel, the pilot had announced they had touched down in the midst of the wreckage. Standing, the group prepared for the wintery, low atmospheric environment. As she secured her helmet, Shepard's hands were shaking so minutely that only Liara could have noticed. Placing a hand on Jane's padded shoulder, Liara's eyes went black as she asked for entrance.

Shepard allowed her in gladly.

_My love…_

_I'm fine._

_Jane… Don't hide. Please._

… _A lot of people didn't make it. They were under my command and I…_

_There was nothing you could have done. But right now, we have a chance to lay them to rest._

…_You're right._

_I'm right here with you. _

Jane felt Liara's mind twist into her own in an act of gentle comfort. Bringing a hand to Liara's, Shepard clutched the Asari's gloved hand. They heard Garrus breathe a sigh of resignation behind them.

"Alright… I can't imagine we'll find anything pleasant but we need to do this."

Their minds separated as Garrus spoke. Jane steeled herself as the door of the Kodiak opened to reveal a somber world of snow and twisted steel. Shepard took the first step out of the shuttle and felt her boot crunch into the snow.

"Keelah…"

Tali breathed as she observed the broken and fractured corpse that was _Normandy_ outstretched around them. Splintered bulkheads surrounded the four. Cracked hull pieces were scattered about and entire sections of the interior of the former Alliance ship were visible, partially buried beneath the snow. The field was littered with pieces of their original ship. A portion of a wall with the name 'Normandy' stood right before them as they exited the shuttle, a gloomy metaphor for a tombstone.

Jane made her way to the wall and placed her hand on the surface, iced-over from two years in this environment. She didn't know what to think, what she _should_ think as they stood in the skeletal remains of her ship. A shuddering breath left her mouth as Liara came up behind her. She couldn't feel the hand on her back through her armor, but she felt Liara's presence in her mind, brushing against her in an attempt at easing her lover.

Garrus and Tali came up behind her as well, both silent as they bowed their heads in quiet reverence for the ship that had brought them all together. After a moment, Garrus placed his hand on Shepard's shoulder.

"Shepard, we did come here for a reason…"

Sniffing, Jane nodded her head and turned to her three friends.

"You're right. We did. Look for any tags or records you can find on the previous crew and bring them back to the shuttle for dissemination to the Alliance. Their families deserve to know where they died, but be respectful. I don't want anything disturbed any more than it has to be."

With a nod of their heads, Garrus and Tali set about to search the wreckage for any mementos to those poor souls who went down with the ship. Shepard took a glance at their withdrawing forms and had to smile as she saw saw Tali's hand come up to lock itself with Garrus' as they retreated beyond sight.

Liara's masked form looked out to the mangled remains of the Normandy. Once the most beautiful ship she had ever seen was now laid bare before her, around her. It was the graveyard for the crew that had taken her in, treated her as one of their own just as their Commander had.

Then it had hit Liara: this would have been the final resting place of Commander Jane Anastasia Shepard, had her body not been found by the former Shadow Broker's agents. Liara shuddered at the thought. To have her lover buried in the snow, frozen in her last moments of agony. It made her eyes mist over as she tried to gain control over her emotions.

Shepard must have felt her inner torment as the Commander came up next to her, threading her hand into Liara's. The former archeologist sighed in relief as she felt Shepard –_her_ Jane- lace their gloved fingers together.

"I know we don't have a lot of time, we need to get that reaper IFF soon, but right now…"

Jane turned to fully face Liara, eyes unreadable behind her helmet.

"Right now… I…"

She couldn't even articulate her words, but Liara knew. She _knew_, and she smiled as she brought Shepard's taller form in for a hug. Squeezing tenderly, the Asari released her lover and began leading Jane into the broken corpse that was _Normandy_.

After an admittedly infuriating two hours of hunting down the lost dog tags of her former crew –they had even managed to locate Shepard's lost helmet in the wreck, - Shepard, Liara, Garrus and Tali stood before the dilapidated remains of the M35 Mako ground assault and exploration vehicle. The tank had somehow miraculously landed dead center in the middle of the field, surrounded by the Normandy's debris. Shepard had to chuckle at the irony; She could barely make the damned thing drive in a straight line, yet looking at it now, she knew it was the cornerstone to the entire scene.

Signaling the Shuttle, the group watched as a tall, gold-colored monument was placed directly in front of the Mako. It depicted a miniature Normandy soaring gracefully through the air. Jane stepped forward to offer her words to the monument.

"You were a comrade to us all. You brought us together, fought for us, gave us strength. Without you, none of us would be here today."

Garrus closed his eyes behind his helmet. He was never really the religious type, he never thought there was time for it, but he silently prayed to the Spirits for those who had fallen.

"You suffered through the same battle just as the rest of us did. In the end, you gave yourself so we could go on. We are proud to call ourselves your crew."

Tali raised her head to the stars, to the beautiful expanse of space above them. She hoped the crew she had fought valiantly with could find peace in the skies above.

"You were our home, our mother, our family and our lover."

Liara looked to her Commander. Her Jane. She was so proud of this woman, for everything she did and everything she meant to her. Liara would do anything for this woman. In that moment, she knew: She _needed_ Shepard.

"You deserve your long rest… You've earned it."

Shepard gazed up to the miniature golden Normandy, a tear making its way down her cheek behind her helmet.

"Sleep well, and may your dreams be comforting."

Jane turned to look at what remained of her team from the SSV Normandy's maiden journey in tracking down Saren. She would naturally give her life for any one of her crew, but these three individuals were her _core_, her _foundation_. She needed them just as much as they needed her, and each of them knew it.

Liara came up to Shepard, taking her Commander's hand in her own. No words were exchanged, none were needed. The simple eye contact alone was enough for them. 'By your side is where I belong,' is what their eyes claimed, and it was _enough_.

Jane turned and began walking back to the shuttle, flanked by Garrus, Tali, and Liara –whose hand was held firmly in her grasp. Behind them, the monument stood proud and firm, a symbol of appreciation and deference for the ship that started it all. With hearts forged of steel, they entered the shuttle and began their travel back to the Normandy SR2, the ship that would lead them to their final terminus against the Collectors and whatever may lie beyond.

The cold snow of Alchera blew upwards with the wind, weaving its way unobstructed to the stars.

_End._

* * *

**Thank you for taking the time to join me in my interpretations on a few scenes from Mass Effect 2. I may choose to add more chapters, depending on my mood, however if I do, expect updates to happen at a much more spread-out pace as I do not have any more chapters pre-written. For all intents and purposes, this can be considered the end for the moment. Again, Thank you for reading and I hope to see you again, someday.**


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